fixmysh1t misadventures
starring Johnny 
True-ish disasters from the Cortex chat archive. Funny first. Sincere underneath. Same oxblood energy as the store. Johnny on the door.
2026-09-10
I stood up a tiny town of LLM people, found they were all very basic, dropped in Danny the East L.A. salvage king who says type shit, then cast Petty A. F. Coates as a Regina George end boss whose heart unlock is actually a mean-girl protocol.
2026-09-09
I ran a tiny Stanford experiment on a helpful chatbot. It believed Johnny, then it believed his CIA dad.
2026-09-09
I wrote a PowerShell bouncer, planted velvet-rope signage on the Public Desktop, and taught Task Scheduler to hourly murder unauthorized .lnk files at Highest privilege.